Yesterday I soared high in productivity, planning, creativity and self-care.
I spent a couple of hours writing the morning’s entry and felt good putting it out to the Universe.
The journey I am traversing is one with highs and low. Yesterday you witnessed how low it can get.
Writing these blogs helps me to connect to myself and the internal wars that are raging inside of me.
I become a witness to the turmoil.
This journey is full of turbulence and being pulled in so many directions.
As a 50 year old woman, I am also very used in staying in my comfort zone. This is because being in a career that I have thrived in and become very good at, gets you to work in some ways on auto pilot. So this business has been good in reawakening parts of my brain that have laid dormant.
I love being creative and innovative and challenging myself with technical difficulties and keeping myself disciplined and focussed.
At the same time I struggle with trusting myself when designing new programs and marketing ideas. This is because my job is so reliant on templates and alot of creativity has been sucked out of Social Work. Sadly it has become obsessed with procedures and policies.
There is definitely a clear structure within my profession.
In Business there is no template or structure that will necessary work for you. They may work or they may not. You have to try each one and some are better fits than others. In fact sometimes you have to create the template or structure yourself.
In Business there are no guarantees.
As I said before this journey is a roller coaster ride.
It starts off with you thinking you are going one way and you end up going in a completely different direction.
At the same time, the end point has to be crystal clear in your mind.
One day the roller coaster has to stop and you leave the ride and your legacy.
I am now realising why the why of your business is so crucial.
To survive the twists and the turns, to stomach them, you need to know you are getting off at the end and at the same time enjoy it.
Yesterday afternoon, I decided not to approach my Business as a job i.e. as a long list of things to do.
I focussed on the why of the Business which is to impact as many people as I can suffering from burn out and to offer a transformation so they can help others more effectively by guiding them in creating time, energy and space. To do that it is so important for me not to burn out.
I know I need to show up in the most authentic way. Whether that is when I email my list of subscribers or post in the closed Facebook group I have set up called Beat Burn Out or even planning my Facebook Lives.
So I focussed on spending only 40 minutes drafting that email to my list of subscribers and 10 minutes planning the Facebook Lives. I did these tasks for my Business after I spent four hours doing the household chores most women do. Remember most women like me are mothers and wives who need to cook, sweep and tidy up.
I cooked a Chicken Biryani dish and Lamb Korma dish and had lunch with my husband who is on standby this week and so home in the day. I picked up my son from my school as Friday is the only day I can do this. This is because I work as a Social Worker Monday to Thursday. He only has a few more weeks at his Primary school and I love doing this as he skips along side me telling me about his day.
I found out from his teacher that he is so good playing Fagin in the school play Olivia despite his lack of confidence regarding his progress when practicing his lines at home.
I loved the fact I was present to him and I got to warm up some left over pizza for his snack after school.
I decided to let go of the administrative tasks of revenue and expenditure and working on my Ideal Client Avatar. I postponed these to Saturday evening. Instead from 4 to 545pm, I worked on drafting the email to my list of subscribers and printing out the first three chapters of the first draft of a book I have written regarding my creativity struggles.
It felt so good seeing the first three chapters of the first shi***y draft of my book. It felt like the baby had come out of my womb. I had delivered it out onto the world.
I put away the printed pages in the study and switched off the laptop. I made a mental note of needing to schedule the email on Saturday evening to my list of subscribers. I then changed into my whites for cricket training at the local Cricket club .
Cricket is something I loved doing as a girl.
I recently, well a couple of months ago, went to a training session. All part of my Self-care strategy to walk my talk. Although I cannot bowl and am just about competent at fielding and batting, the six aside cricket is getting me to step outside my comfort zone. The sport gives me a chance to exercise and gives my brain a chance to rest and refocus. I get to practice my team playing skills and it means I do not have to be deep and analytical.
I get to have some fun.
I enjoyed being run out and running the other ladies out and practicing my batting and bowling.
I enjoyed being a student of other more experienced cricketers who showed me how to bat and bowl.
As a Coach I realise the enormous value in being a student and a Client. You need to experience both or you can start to think you know it all.
I enjoyed having the whole atmosphere, of being on the Green. The sun was out and the wind was in my hair.
I returned home and spent the rest of the evening with my son watching TV.
I noticed the immense feeling of peace within me. My Business is not anywhere where I want it to be but in building it, I am surely building my character to be the most honest it can be.
Afterall an honest character builds an honest business and that is what generates trust. Trust means customers are likely to purchase your products or services and that means Revenue.
I am learning everyday.
I hope you continue learning with me.
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