August 13, 2019

Patterns of a Self-help Junkie!

I used to be a Self-Help Junkie or Personal Development Junkie.

I noticed a pattern with myself though. I never finished what I started.

I tried too many things all at the same time.

I had fingers in too many pots.

There was such a fear of missing out on information, knowledge and wisdom, I buzzed like a bee from flower to flower getting nectar from each flower.

But I never digested the nectar, it stayed in the stomach never became honey.

The sticky mess that honey is….

Contentment, bliss and joy is like honey, sweet and sticky.

With Self-help you think if you do this or that or read this or read that or follow that person you will taste the honey.

The honey my love is inside of you.

You gotta stick with the mess inside of you.

Process it inside of you.

The nectar isn’t in the books or the strategies or tips.

They are just tools.

The secret is within the process.

You got to trust the process.

You got to be patient with the process.

As a recovering Self-help Junkie I know that is the hardest part.


Being patient.


I know am committed to finishing what I started.

If anything in this blog has really resonated with you and you would like to discuss the subject further with Taniya privately then use this link.



Having qualified as a Social Worker in July 1991 from Coventry University, it has been over two decades that I have been on the front line working with children and young people who are traumatized and on the margins of society. Although I studied Psycho-dynamic counselling for two years at Goldsmiths College (1991-1993), I decided to integrate Psycho-dynamic theories and skills into my Social work practice and flirt with and immerse myself in studying Islam as well as interfaith dialogue and friendships. For the last 20 years, I have been working in a multi-disciplinary Youth Offending Team in South London, comprised of Professional colleagues from different faiths and cultural backgrounds trying to support young people in the criminal justice system. I am married and mother to three sons, and juggle Social Work and interfaith dialogue with my writing, studying and the needs of home and family.


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